shiiiit
Couple things just occured to me. First, Christmas is next Friday. That’s kinda a big deal. I have to get a lot of stuff in the next week. Second, I have my advisory session at SMCC this Friday and I start classes on January 11th. That’s going to be a HUGE pace change from my life for the last year and a half. I’ve been living pretty well and enjoying it quite a lot but I’m suddenly faced with the end of that relaxed open lifestyle. I haven’t really considered the fact that I’ll suddenly have not only a schedule but a lot of shit to do outside of that schedule. This is probably the best argument for going to college directly after high school. In that case you’re already accustomed to scheduled life and thus having class at 10 doesn’t seem so bad at all, but when you’ve been living without much going on the sudden jump back into daily or semi-daily class seems straight up scary. There’s also the fear that I’m just plainly not as smart academically as I was in September of 2008. I haven’t written a paper or done a real equation since June of 2008 and I’ll be starting college courses in January 2010. That’s a huge gap for me, I used to write papers every week and do math every fucking day. I’m so scared that I’m going to so royally fuck up. The notion that this is going to be genuinely hard is something I’ve somehow managed to block out until tonight. This is a problem.
